At Extended-Student-Loan Solutions, we think that the nagging dilemma of student-loan debt is bigger than life. This life, that is. That’s why we’re providing you two more lifetimes to pay for it well.
Q: simply therefore I’m totally clear about this, exactly just what the fuck have you been talking about?
A: We hear most of the right time from anxious pupils who think they’ll probably grow old and perish before they repay their loans. We’re proud to help you to look them into the eye and“Go say ahead and die. We’ve got you covered.”
Q: how to carry on my re re payments if I’m dead?
A: Our patented reincarnation pc computer software tracks you as you transfer to the next life, seamlessly moving your loan towards the new you so you don’t miss an individual repayment.
Q: just How precisely performs this advantage me?
A: By expanding your loan’s “life,” so to speak, we’re able to reduce your payments that are monthly increasing our likelihood of getting repaid. Imagine decreasing the stress that is included with paying down an unreasonably big sum of cash in a single life time. Then imagine us reducing the stress of loaning those amounts of income to those who majored in philosophy.
Q: therefore, are you currently saying i could stop payments that are making and simply allow my future selves protect the rest?
A: Unfortunately, no. It is gonna just simply take all three of you to out close this thing.
Q: Will this software tell me personally exactly exactly what I’m planning to be within the next life?
A: we understand hardly any concerning the journey that every individual makes while he or she crosses over. All we understand without a doubt is the fact that anything you become owes us a lot of cash.
Q: do you want to let my future self understand a small bit about me personally so your debt doesn’t come completely away from remaining field?
A: for every single of y our debtors, we develop a change file with personal information in regards to the customer. We realize that an individual is way more acceptable about making re re payments when that individual seems attached to their previous self as soon as that previous self didn’t major in philosophy.
Q: This all seems great, exactly what if we keep coming back being a horse?
A: The truth is that you’re about as expected to spend down your loan being a horse when you are in your present incarnation, so we’ll take our opportunities.
Q: What if I actually repay my loan before we die, in this life?
A: Oh, my Jesus, that is adorable.
Q: I’ve removed a lot more than three hundred thousand bucks in student education loans. I’m wondering if you’re able to tell me why used to do that.
A: is the fact that . . . a question?
Q: I happened to be concerned about applying to grad college and amassing more debt www.speedyloan.net/reviews/maxlend/ in addition to my undergraduate loans, nevertheless now I feel, like, Screw it, it is the horse’s problem, right?
A: To be clear, you’re not surely becoming a horse.
Q: I would like to be described as a horse so bad.
A: i am aware you do.
Q: Wouldn’t your efforts be much better spent finding an answer to tuition that is rising, as opposed to wanting to unlock the period of presence through the transcendence of consciousness?
A: You suggest the harder thing? No.
Q: My moms and dads need to know: when they co-sign my loan, will their future selves be held accountable because of it?
A: Yes, but their future selves should be liberated to find your future self to aid down utilizing the loan. Just be sure they realize that your future self may well not know very well what they’re referring to, because you’re a turtle.
Q: All this work existential talk is making me concern whether we could also say for many it was me whom took down this loan to begin with, you know?
A: it had been you.
Q: Or . . . had been it?
A: It was.
Q: is it feasible that I’ll be expected to assume the mortgage of just one of my past selves, and find yourself with two loans?
A: Dimensional Double Debt Dipping is prohibited, so no.
Q: What if we keep coming back as somebody from England? are you able to transform loan payments from pounds sterling?
A: currently, we would not have that capability.
Q: Come to think about it, some racehorses make tons of cash. Because you won’t be there, remember if I come back as a racehorse, can I help name him?
A: No? You’ll be the horse.
